Cape Bible Chapel | Cape Girardeau Church

MARRIAGE & weddingS

Marriage is a gift from God that reflects the relationship Christ has with His church (Ephesians 5). The wedding ceremony is a special event in the life of a man and woman where they publicly ask God to make them one in the bonds of marriage. The commitment made to one another before the Lord in the wedding ceremony is sacred and holy. It is the desire of Cape Bible Chapel that a couple approach marriage according to biblical standards and in a way that is pleasing to God. We believe that the term “marriage” has only one meaning and that is marriage sanctioned by God which joins one man and one woman in a single, exclusive union, as delineated in Scripture (Genesis 2:23-25, Matthew 19:4-6). No marriage outside this biblical definition will be performed at The Chapel.

In keeping with biblical teaching, the following is required for any couple seeking to celebrate a marriage at The Chapel:

Faith – Both bride and groom must have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 6:14).
Celibacy – The engaged couple must live separately before their wedding day. Sexual intimacy is to be celebrated exclusively within marriage (1 Thessalonians 4:3).
Man/Woman Monogamy – Marriage is a sacred union of one man and one woman. Cape Bible Chapel does not recognize, nor will it take part in, any ceremony that does not meet this basic criteria (Genesis 2:24;Matthew 19:4-5).
Premarital Counseling – The engaged couple must participate in premarital counseling prior to the wedding ceremony. Please schedule with the pastor officiating the ceremony at least six months in advance to allow adequate time for premarital counseling.
Church Membership/Attendance – Either the bride or groom must be a member in good standing at The Chapel.

Because marriage is designed to be a life-long union, The Chapel does not take part in remarriages except under the following circumstances:

Death – The former spouse is deceased (Romans 7:2; 1 Corinthians 7:39).
Marital Unfaithfulness – The former spouse committed adultery against the spouse seeking remarriage (Matthew 5: 32, 19:3-9).
Desertion – The spouse seeking remarriage was deserted by an unbelieving spouse (1 Corinthians 7:15).
Divorce Before Conversion – The spouse seeking remarriage became a believer in Christ after the divorce.

Finally, for any off site weddings, the pastors and elders of Cape Bible Chapel shall only officiate weddings and solemnize marriages between one man and one woman.

Pre-Planning for the Wedding

The privilege of a wedding ceremony at The Chapel is reserved for members in good standing. Either the bride or the groom must be a member.
Pastoral approval is required prior to confirming your wedding date/time.
Premarital Counseling is required. Schedule with the pastor officiating the ceremony. Please note: allow for at least six months for premarital counseling.
If the couple desires a guest clergy to officiate the wedding ceremony, a Chapel pastor must give prior approval. The guest clergy must also sign a Cape Bible Chapel doctrinal agreement statement.
Meet with the office manager to schedule dates and to receive the wedding packet and instructions.

For more detailed information, check out our Wedding Information Guide for members.

pre-engagement counseling

The Pre-Engagement Counseling Ministry at Cape Bible Chapel seeks to encourage and elevate the seriousness of the marriage covenant by guiding men and women who are members of The Chapel considering engagement as a next step in their current relationship. Seeing that marriage is a lifelong covenant before the Lord, the pre-engagement counseling ministry seeks to help couples biblically evaluate themselves, their relationship, and the significance of this covenant before proceeding with engagement and into pre-marriage counseling. (Ephesians 5:22-25)

While not required before pre-marriage counseling, pre-engagement counseling offers an added opportunity to assess whether to move forward with a greater commitment in the relationship. This setting creates space for evaluation without the pressure of already committing to enter into a covenant before the Lord.

Grow in understanding of the seriousness of the marriage covenant (Genesis 2:18-24; Ephesians 5:22; Malachi 2:13-16; Proverbs 2:16-22)
Reflect on personal salvation, sanctification, and sacrifice (Romans 12:1-2; Colossians1:10; 3:12-13; Matthew 16:24-26)
Prayerful preparation to determine God’s will (Matthew 6:5-14; James 4:13-16)
Grow in humility in the body of Christ (Proverbs 16:18; Philippians 2:5-11)
Couples are partnered with a pre-engagement mentor couple who will walk through the sessions below. The couple will be required to read and interact with a number of resources that will given to them by the ministry to help them think through their readiness.
Session 1 – Marriage is a Serious Covenant - Should We Be Thinking About Marriage?
Description of Session: The goal of this session will be to walk through the assigned resources and discuss the couple’s understanding of the seriousness of the covenant of marriage and whether they should even be thinking about marriage.

Session 2 – Personal Reflection on Salvation, Sanctification, Sacrifice – (Meet Separately)
Description of Session: This session is designed for individual counseling rather than meeting as a couple. The man and woman will each meet separately with the pre-engagement counseling couple to discuss their own personal salvation, sanctification, and purity. In this session the counselors will use the assigned resources to help each individual grow in humility, discuss past relationships, and determine how to share any needed information in the future with their potential spouse. (Ex. Use of Pornography, Past Sexual Relationships, Self-Pleasure, STD’s or Need for Testing, Growth in Accountability to Men and Women). The counselors will confirm if anyone has been discipling the man and woman. If so, they will ask for approval to speak with the one discipling to gain insight into the spiritual strengths and weaknesses of the individuals.

Session 3 – Not Preparing Alone! Accountability and Seeking God’s Will
Description of Session: This session brings the couple back together and focuses on what they have learned about themselves, their relationship, and their pursuit of personal holiness. This session seeks to help them understand God’s will and evaluate what the couple needs to continue to pray about before taking the next step of engagement. The session will also include recommendations from the pre-engagement counselors.

Session 4 – Moving Forward! – Next Steps
Description of Session: During this session, the discussion will center around any questions the couple has as well as the spiritual growth they have seen in each other’s life during the last few months. The counselors will convey their assessment and either recommend the couple proceed with engagement and pre-marital counseling or continue to grow for a few more months and then come back for reassessment with their mentor couple.
Should We Get Married? How to Evaluate Your Relationship – William Smith
Pre-Engagement – 5 Questions to Ask Yourselves – David Powlison & John Yenchko
From Pride to Humility – Stuart Scott
Your Dating Relationship and Your Sexual Past – Ellen Mary Dykas
Sex Before Marriage: How Far is Too Far? – Timothy Lane
30-Day Devotional – Engagement: Preparing for Marriage – Mike McKinley
If you are interested in taking advantage of this ministry in your relationship, please fill out the form below. You will then be partnered with a mentorship couple who will reach out to you for next steps.

Pre-Engagement Intake Form

pre-marital counseling

The Pre-Marriage Counseling Ministry at Cape Bible Chapel helps prepare couples to make a lifelong covenant before God. Pre-Marriage Counseling at The Chapel consists of eight sessions, typically completed over the course of four months prior to the wedding. Please plan appropriately to give yourself plenty of time to complete all eight sessions. Completion of all the material in the sessions is required for a pastor to determine if they can endorse and perform the marriage ceremony.

Reminder:

Performance of marriage ceremonies is a service to the body, NOT an obligation. Completing pre-marital counseling is NOT an agreement of approval to be married by this pastor or anyone else at this church. Our counsel is based solely on God’s Word. Please review The Chapel’s Statement of Faith, before submitting your request.

Session 1 – Initial Meeting – Testimonies, Why Do you Want to Get Married
Session 2 – The Covenant of Marriage
Session 3 – The Heart
Session 4 - Communication
Session 5 – Conflict Resolution
Session 6 – Roles and Responsibilities/Family
Session 7 – Stewardship of Finances in Marriage
Session 8 – Biblical Understanding of Intimacy
If you are interested in taking advantage of this ministry in your relationship, please fill out the form below. Once your application is submitted and before your first meeting you will receive an email from the Counseling Office to introduce you to the pastor/couple that you will be meeting with and set a time for the first session.

Pre-Marital Intake Form